Daughter of Claus: Day XXX

The strength of reflection

On the jukebox: This Year’s Love by David Gray

There is something special - almost sacred - about allowing yourself the time to reflect over the festive season.

I love new beginnings, and all the opportunities these offer. The first day of a sparkling new year is just so neat, so irresistible - but I do also think that, if you’re going to go down the resolution route, it is a rookie error to aim for the first of January to kick things off. If you know what changes you want to make, far better to implement them immediately, to get a head start. Or, if you must wait for a perfect package of a calendar date to begin, then aim for the first day of February. That way, you are not carrying part of the collective, global burden of seeing through resolutions specifically attached to the new year.

When I was pregnant with Elfi, just entering my third trimester, I started to adopt (or adapt) a series of small habits, making bite-sized incremental changes that would set a firm baseline for other changes I wanted to make. The essence of the majority of these - even if not the detail of the habits themselves - has indeed set me up for more substantial changes since.

I won’t go into the theory of it all here; how to find the right mix of habits versus goals for you, and how to make lasting change. That isn’t what this is about. It isn’t about quantifying the change made (though this can certainly be a helpful spur for some people, myself included - I did say I was competitive, and never more so than with myself), it is about the quality - the honesty - of the reflection. And, as well as feeling satisfied about a job well done, it is important to know when to let go of other things.

Letting go is something I have spent some effort working on over the years. I like completeness. It has taken me many years to realise that what I choose to let go is at least as important as what I choose to focus on. There are many motivational aphorisms I could include here, but instead here is a quote from my favourite author, Tove Jansson:

All things are so very uncertain, and that's exactly what makes me feel reassured.

At this time of year - a point of change, a moment to recharge and harness strength - I like to remind myself that I am, as we all are, a work in progress. And this makes me happy.

I would love to hear about your own Christmas folklore and memories. Do you have any personal traditions that mark how you reflect on the fast-disappearing year, and look to the year ahead?